Landon Barker Opens Up About Abusing Alcohol & Mental Health Struggles

Landon Barker is getting candid about his mental health struggles, and derealization.

The 20-year-old musician has dealt with derealization, a disorder that makes someone feel detached from their thoughts and body, and it all started with alcohol.

He’s also gone through heightened OCD, heightened ADHD and heightened anxiety while dissociating.

“It originally started with a bad habit with alcohol. I was abusing it and just abusing that substance, and then one day it just shocked me, and I had gone through that for months,” he told People. “It was awful, and I went through heightened OCD, heightened ADHD and heightened anxiety, all while disassociating and feeling like I was in a video game. I was watching my whole entire life through a movie screen. It was honestly awful. I always love to spread awareness about suicide and talk about it.”

“I feel like if you hold it in inside, it’s a lot harder, and I feel like all the messages that I got when I posted about it honestly made me feel better,” Landon added. “Looking to the public for support and more knowledge was honestly comforting for me and letting people know truly who I am, even on my phone through a social media platform was actually kind of helpful for me.”

The “Friends With Your EX” singer notes that he still deals with OCD, ADHD and anxiety, and the disassociation is what triggered the alcohol abuse.

“I’ve always struggled with OCD, ADHD and anxiety, but yeah, disassociating and dissociation kind of just hit me like a truck last year and it was just the most awful experience,” he said. “It kind of started with: I would drink, and then the day after, I would disassociate really bad, and that’s kind of how my habit of drinking a lot started. It was like, oh, I’d feel better the second that I had a drink, and so yeah, it kind of just all started and it all kicked up really fast.”

Getting a concussion a year ago made him stop drinking, and now, he says, “I think 100 percent it’s important for me to not make that a habit again.”

“I always tell myself, ‘I’ll only drink on special occasions now.’ I just steer away from everything.”

Through it all, though, Landon shares that he has learned a lot about how to help with his OCD, ADHD and dissociation.

“I’ve learned all these tips and tricks and research so much, so I honestly did come out with a lot of knowledge on all of the stuff that I suffer with,” he said. “Honestly, I was a little bit too scared to start medication. I just know how I get just having kind of an addictive personality, and I feel like I would be too scared to put myself in a dependent situation where I must use something every single day. I was just a little bit too nervous to even try it, but I was doing a lot of therapy and working out, and it was helpful.”